11.1.13 "Refining and Freedom"

Today’s Scripture is:     Proverbs 30: 7-9  (NIRV)

“Lord, I ask you for two things.  Don’t refuse me before I die. Keep lies far away from me.   Don’t make me either poor or rich, but give me only the bread I need each day. If you don’t, I might have too much. Then I might say I don’t know you.   I might say, ‘Who is the Lord?’ Or I might become poor and steal. Then I would bring shame to the name of my God.

I love this scripture…. It puts things in proper perspective for me.  Daily Bread… just give me my Daily Bread, Lord.  To actually have this desire – where I’m not praying for “more” or worrying about having “too little” - could be so freeing!   And I think the lies that are being talked about here are the ones that satan uses to make me think wealth is important, or the lies he uses to distort what wealth, power, money, or prosperity really are.

I feel like I’ve come to understand and know this perspective and “contentment” in a very small way over the last few years.  Many of you who know my husband and I, know that we have been living in a travel trailer for the last 6 years.  Actually it was 6 years yesterday – we moved into it on Halloween night 2007.   We bought land and were going to build a house on it and live in a travel trailer for a year or so until the house was built.  Well, shortly after we moved, Mark lost his job and the whole trajectory of what we had planned, changed.  I could easily write a book about our 6 year journey, but in a nutshell, the first 3 years were full of struggle for me.  My desire for “more” than what we had and how we were living made me unhappy and fearful and even hopeless at times.  It was a huge time of refining for me.  It’s amazing how God worked though…and brought surprising blessings to me during that refining time, which in turn gave me a thankful heart.  For the first time, I saw the richness of health, animals, farm life, nature, friendships, gardens, etc. as more important than what type of home I lived in or how much stuff I had.  I began to appreciate the “freedom” of living without tons of housework, or having to find space for all my stuff, or being free from the feeling of “keeping up” with the neighbors!  Life became much simpler and I found wealth in my relationship with Jesus and my husband… and in the small gifts God gave me that made me feel good – like finding our first egg from our first chicken in the nesting box!  Or picking fresh green beans from our garden, or seeing a rainbow over the farm after a rain storm.  It was crazy how God truly changed my heart and my perspective…and the last 3 years have been a blessing!

I still have a long way to go and I’m still on this journey – learning more every day what the meaning of contentment is…and what God’s perspective is on wealth, accumulation, generosity, and living a contrast life!  I really resonated with these verses today because I feel that over the last 6 years, God has given me an understanding of the importance of Daily Bread without all the other trappings that fight for my attention over Him.  And even though we’ve had some lean times over these 6 years, He’s never not given us what we’ve needed…we’ve never had to beg, borrow, or steal – He’s always provided!   I didn’t willingly move into this journey, but I’ve definitely grown in my walk with Him because of it.  Do I still have things that I want and desire – YES!  But everything belongs to God and the only thing desiring “more” does for me, is bring fear and hopelessness if God isn’t most important.

Thanks for letting me share today – how do these verses touch you today?  I would love to hear!

Denise